The Gift of Grandparents

Grandparents often provide a unique brand of love that fosters a sense of acceptance and belonging in children. Research indicates that close bonds with grandparents can lead to greater emotional security, which in turn reduces stress and anxiety. As Robert Brault wisely noted, “Some of the best lessons we ever learn are learned from our grandparents.” The comfort and stability offered by a grandparent create a foundation where children feel valued and deeply loved just as they are.

This nurturing relationship not only encourages confidence and self-assurance but also promotes social growth, establishing a profound sense of family belonging that is difficult to replicate. Literature shows that these strong bonds significantly contribute to a child's overall emotional well-being, shaping their development for years to come.

Passing Down Wisdom and Values

Grandparents are natural storytellers, carriers of family heritage and values that give children a sense of connection to their roots. Studies show that children who understand more about their family history are often more resilient and adaptable. Emory University’s “Do You Know?” study found that kids who know their family stories have higher self-esteem and better coping skills during life’s ups and downs.

These shared stories and traditions foster a child’s sense of identity, connecting them to their past and helping them feel anchored. As Joyce Allston put it, “Grandparents, like heroes, are as necessary to a child’s growth as vitamins.” Through everyday interactions—be it a shared recipe, family story, or a valuable life lesson—grandparents help instill values that stay with children as they grow.

Cognitive Growth and Curiosity

Grandparents also have the potential to inspire learning in a unique way, sparking curiosity through their life stories, hobbies, and experiences. A study published in The Gerontologist found that children who interact with their grandparents regularly often demonstrate stronger cognitive skills. By encouraging activities like nature walks, storytelling, or exploring family history, grandparents help foster a child’s intellectual curiosity in an engaging, relaxed way.

As one anonymous writer put it, “A grandparent is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher, and a little bit best friend.”

Takeaways for Parents

Encourage Regular Connection

Building a routine of calls, visits, or shared activities helps foster strong bonds, providing children with consistent love and a steady presence in their lives.

Celebrate Family Stories and Traditions

Encourage grandparents to share family history and cherished traditions, enriching your child’s sense of identity and resilience as they connect to their heritage.

Embrace Intergenerational Differences

Help children appreciate the unique experiences and perspectives that grandparents bring, nurturing their sense of empathy and understanding of different worldviews.

Support Learning Through Play

Allow grandparents to engage in relaxed, unstructured play with your child, whether through crafts, gardening, or simple games. These shared activities help children develop social skills and curiosity in a nurturing setting.

When Relationships Are Complex

It’s important to acknowledge that, for some families, grandparent relationships may come with complexities or past wounds. If a relationship is fractured or if a grandparent’s involvement may not be healthy for a child, it’s okay to approach these relationships with caution. Not every grandparent relationship can be a source of unconditional support or joy. When patterns of behaviour are toxic or boundary-crossing, protecting your child from potential harm is entirely appropriate and, in many cases, essential.

The goal is to allow positive, nurturing relationships that genuinely enrich a child’s life, which sometimes means setting healthy boundaries with grandparents if their influence isn’t supportive. This approach allows parents to focus on relationships that foster safety and growth for the child, ensuring that the legacy of family connection remains positive. In this way, you’re prioritising your child’s wellbeing, offering them a sense of connection that’s both nourishing and beneficial.

Grandparents offer a legacy of love, wisdom, and strength that can leave an indelible mark on a child’s heart.

By encouraging these connections, parents give their children the gift of knowing they’re part of something bigger—a family that values, loves, and supports them. For grandparents who step into this role with patience and an open heart, the impact is lasting and deeply meaningful, creating cherished memories and bonds that last a lifetime.